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Posted by on Nov 16, 2013 in Self-interviews | 0 comments

Another exclusive interview with legendary everyman Kent Roberts

The Kent Roberts mind control station.

The Kent Roberts mind control station.

BY KENT ROBERTS

Today, we speak with Kent Roberts. (Roberts is completely on board with the efforts of this publication. He has issued no lawsuits or cease-and-desist orders to himself, Kent Global, or any of its subsidiaries since our first issue, believing that any self-press is good or neutral self-press.)

Kent: You really are a beacon of yourself. Why does the light shine so brightly?
Kent: Hm, great question. I think self-forgiveness is part of it. In spite of everything, I still believe that I am really good at heart.
Kent: So… you just impersonated Anne Frank while metaphorically pardoning yourself for Nazi behavior. That’s what you did.
Kent: Don’t put words into my mouth. At least not those words.
Kent: Frankly, I can’t help it.
Kent: Sometimes I get the sense that you think I’m your puppet.
Kent: I’m making your words form with my mind right now.
Kent: You are sick. You think you are some kind of god.
Kent: Not exactly. I am capable of mind-control, but just with you. It doesn’t work on anyone else.
Kent: What, are you saying I’m more susceptible to mind-control than other people are?
Kent: Specifically toward me, yes.
Kent: Okay, jackass… if you really were capable of controlling me, we would not be arguing.
Kent: I like arguing with you. I think it refines my perspective.
Kent: So, you just like to argue, and you are playing devil’s advocate.
Kent: No, I always put you in the role of devil’s advocate. I’d rather be on the right side.
Kent: That is warped.
Kent: See, like I said though, you’re wrong.
Kent: Let me get this straight. The way that you argue is by forcing me to have the wrong perspective, just so that you can always be right?
Kent: Weird… That was actually correct, what you said.
Kent: You aren’t even good at this.

[G+]

Another exclusive interview with legendary everyman Kent Roberts

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