by Kent
TGIKent.com
Kent: I’m here if you need me.
Kent: What do you mean? Is this the beginning of the interview?
Kent: Yes. The most important thing I can do for you and for myself is to listen to you. In fact, at the risk of sounding totally gay for you, I want you to know that I would like to dedicate my life to learning how to best listen to you and serve your needs.
Kent: I really appreciate that.
Kent: Good. I was worried that you would judge me for being so dedicated to you – like I want to be your secretary or something.
Kent: I think the term is administrative assistant.
Kent: Um… does that mean you’re hiring me?
Kent: You can do whatever you want. I think it’s clear you won’t receive a salary.
Kent: I don’t think that was clear.
Kent: You think I’m going to pay you to do… I guess, sure, that’s fine – I’ll pay you.
Kent: I was just testing you there. I want to do this on a volunteer basis.
Kent: Uh… You want to do office chores for me—is that what you mean?
Kent: I like to do all of the kinds of things that you don’t like to do. I want to free up your time to be able to write, and think about things, and make videos, and go to the park and sit, and –
Kent: Well, I think you know I don’t go to the park and sit.
Kent: Because you’re too busy doing the things that I am now going to be doing for you.
Kent: Well… [Sigh] I don’t think this is going to work.
Kent: We have to try it though. Who wants to go through their whole life doing all of this kind of mundane horrible stuff, like doing the dishes and writing out checks to the electric company and transferring junk mail from the mailbox to the dumpster. Who does? I do. I do, for the right man. You are that man.
Kent: You specifically care about helping me. You want to dedicate your life to helping me with the most boring, soul-sucking stuff.
Kent: Yes.
Kent: Just because I’m me.
Kent: I think so. Or maybe because both of us are me. But that sounds a little selfish. It sounds like I just want to help Kent Roberts out to help myself out. No: I want to help Kent Roberts out to help Kent Roberts out.
Kent: I don’t… think that’s possible.
Kent: Not unless you try.
Kent: Oh, now you’re asking for a commitment from me? I thought this was something that you were doing yourself.
Kent: Well, as you can imagine, I need your assistance. If we are divided, that ends up being a severe problem. We start to unravel – both of us do.
Kent: I don’t see why both of us should unravel just because I disagree with some crazy idea you have about helping me.
Kent: Sir, it is the nature of yarn. Don’t deny your roots.
Kent: That’s completely nonsensical. What exactly is the rabbit hole? I am beginning to think that you never know you are going into the rabbit hole. You just know you’ve gone through it at a certain point. At some point I went through the rabbit hole. I remember it clearly.
Kent: I thought I was playing the crazy one.
Kent: I’m trying to connect with you, dude. Give me a chance.
(Volume 11, Issue 3: May 15, 2012)